Don't let me be selfish.

Tuesday, 19 September 2017

Let me be selfish today,
Let me cry and not wonder how,
Someone has it worse than me.
Let me think, about my deferred dreams,
About my deterred aspirations,
Let me call myself a victim today.
Let me be unhappy today,
Let me know that it's normal.
So don't say that I'm depressed, 
Without knowing the extent of my problems
And please,
Don’t say that I'm always unhappy
Because it's just for today,
I promise, I'm not "always like this"

Oh, I forgot about my problems,
In trying to seek for your validation,
It's a beautiful trick, to suppress my demons,
So that we could talk about yours'.

But,

Let me be selfish today
Let me walk out of the door,
Without taking any permission,
Let me drown in my sorrows today,
And please don't try to make me feel better,
Because it's ok,
So let me think about the what ifs and could've been,
Without making me feel like I'm a wreck.
I promise that it's not a first world problem.

But it's trivial alright, and I'm ashamed of calling it a problem
Because you laughed,
But let me cry today
So that when I smile tomorrow, 
You could ask me to smile my widest. 

And I'll realize, like I always do, 
That it was nothing to worry about,
And that you were right. 

I get the point now,
After many years,
That your life is as complicated as you want it to get

And the time I spent hating you for not caring for my mental health,
Was the time I was annihilating my own self. 

So, please never let me be selfish, ever again.



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