Blue October

Monday, 24 October 2016

Still undecided. Still flailing, falling, hurting. Confusion. Iffy personality. Agitation. Thousand and one nightmares. Suddenly the water spills and everything you know of yourself to be true, disintegrates. Tears. Blood. Doubts. Everything shrunken. Unsettling. Every bad feeling seeps in, how, it always finds a way. Stupid. Dumb. Careless. Thoughts come and go, without any progress. Knowledge floats. Stammering, struggling to speak. Stupid. Back to being a child. Annoying, irritating, moody, crazy. Back to being an adult. Hate. Love. Disrespect. Judgment. Temporary happiness. Laughter hurts the ears, silence kills everything. Right. Wrong. Does it matter? They want to be right, you want them to be wrong. Fighting, fighting over things that don't matter, flipping out. Now its 3 A.M, you're fighting your trivial battles, making life seem like its less than what it really is, crying over spilled milk. Always. Just stop. Unloved. Unimportant. Unknown. Worthless. Graceless. Detached- now go, leave. Crawl. Walk. Run. Take off that pale blue gown, light a cigarette. So they say, there's fire at one end of the cigarette and fool at the other. You’re a fool, to have fought for nothing, to have lost everything; for nothing. Now you're running. For nothing. But to where? How can I help, when your mind refuses to see beyond the lies you've been told. I know it hurts, for everyone has got their own demon of destruction. But come out. Screaming. Crying. Bleeding. You're almost yourself. This isn't the end. This wasn't your only chance; for there isn't an end to possibilities in a universe so great and vast. 

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