Holding on and letting go.

Saturday, 28 October 2017

I've learnt that in a sum that coheres, I owe everything that I am, to myself. I may have glutted myself on opinions that didn't matter, impertinent debates that slewed into oblivion, and small talks that always ran into a ditch - all this and several spurious manifestations with which I had begun to become familiar with, came sporadically and in pieces.



I have decided to step back to look at the bigger picture. I don't want to contract into tiny pixels, as and when different situations present themselves to me. I want to become one person, from sundown to sundown.

Of late, I've been playing myself in a role that I never knowingly assigned to myself. It's something that I took up as I went along the way, to fit into the second best thing; which was really the distorted version of the very best thing that I could’ve wanted for myself. But I've realized that the second best thing for me is the worst thing, as it is not me. And if I continue being on the same path, I will contrive a big crisis upon myself.

I know for a fact that we all have varied aspirations which certainly do not have a common denominator; but what they do have in common is the quality and the dignity. And when I say that I wanted the very best thing, I do not mean it in an absolute sense, since we don't live in a utopia. I mean it in a sense which entails my very limitations, and my knowledge of them, calculated and sorted.

 So, I refuse to rush with the flow.

I have decided to take a few steps back to come back to where I really belong. For I have found a sense of satisfaction in remaining still and observing more than I could ever comprehend; before leaving it all to dust. I have found happiness in going in depth about a subject than rushing through it for the sake of the exam. I have learnt that being responsible is difficult, when absconding responsibility and getting rid of it, isn’t. I’ve learnt that I will have to deal with a lot of nonsense from whippersnappers, and that I'll find it difficult to stay calm.

But stepping back has made me realize, where life truly resides- in the broadened horizons of a child, for whom, anything is possible. Life resides in the guilt of wrongdoing, the insecurities and the fears; it resides in the lowest of lows and highest of highs.

 And as far as the second best thing goes, I would describe it as an aberration from my main goal. Because I believe in holding on, before I really have to let go. J 

And trust me, holding on is always the better option, until it's an age old notion which does nobody any good; then you should really learn how to let go.


7 comments:

  1. "Unforgettable Stuff"

    - Your Fan :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha, Hey you. Always surprising me. :)
      Thank you so much for your words

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  2. The same goes for you too. I thought, you're less [your career move will change you, but I was wrong], you really are more. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I see. Your photograph speaks volumes. :)



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  3. I am extremely impressed along with your writing abilities, Thanks for this great share.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey keep posting such sensible and significant articles.

    ReplyDelete

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